“I’m stuck, Angelle. The number on the scale hasn’t budged in months. I’m not even sure why I signed up to work with you on weight loss. I’ve tried everything.”
I could hear the frustration in my new client’s voice. She had tried every diet under the sun. She had counted calories and points. She had gone low fat and high carb; low carb and high protein; gluten-free and sugar-free and I’m quite sure her weight had bounced up and down more times than she even told me about in our initial consultation. The emotional and physical stress was palpable, even over the phone.
After reviewing her current diet and health history, I saw quite a few tweaks we could make that would probably make a difference on the scale. She needed to BUMP up the quality of her food and we needed to work on BALANCING out her meals and help her get into a rhythm with when she ate.
At the end of that first appointment though, I took a risk. I gave her suggestions that had nothing to do with food. Her reaction was predictable and slightly uncomfortable.
The exchange went something like this:
Me: “Before we make any changes to your diet I want you to do two things over the next two weeks. One, I want you to take 10 deep breaths before you eat. Put a post-it note on the table or wherever you eat that says BREATHE on it. Two, the only movement (aka exercise) I want you to make sure to do every single day is to find a high-energy song you love and dance to it. When no one is around. Let go of thinking about how you look because no one is watching. Turn the music up and dance even if it feels silly or uncomfortable. Really shake it.”
Her: Silence… More silence. “That’s what you want me to do. To lose weight. Breathe when I eat and dance for 5 minutes.”
Me: “Yes.” Silence… “I can give you the science behind these suggestions, but I am going to wait to do that. I want you out of your head and into your body. No counting, no measuring, no overthinking anything. Breathe every time you eat. Dance every day when no one is watching. Silence…Remember when you signed on with me and you were hoping for something ‘different’. Well, this is different. Are you in or are you out?”
Her: “I’m in. I’ll do it but I don’t know how…”
Me: “Stop there. Are you in or are you out?” (said with a bit of tough love because I know how we women can talk ourselves in and out of about anything)
Her: “I’m in.”
Now, this was actually a first for me in my coaching. Not that I hadn’t invited women to do some ‘unconventional’ things that are seemingly unrelated to their health and weight issues, but the 5 minutes of dancing was a new strategy. I didn’t know if she’d follow through and I didn’t know how it would affect the scale. I just knew she needed to shake things up a bit.
When her next appointment rolled around two weeks later and I hadn’t heard from her in between sessions, I was a little nervous. I started out like I always do, asking what’s ‘New & Good’.
Her response: “I feel great and I lost almost 4 pounds! For the first time in months. And I didn’t change my diet. I breathed before every meal like you said and I danced each day. It was the most amazing experience. Not at first. I felt pretty self-conscious and silly for falling for this ‘scam’ of a health coach. I was ready to ask for a refund. But I decided to keep my word to myself and to you. I did it and about 5 days in I felt a shift. The self-conscious feeling dropped away. I felt like I used to feel when I was much younger. I felt happy. Then I felt sad for a few days. Sad about how I had gotten so far off track. Once when I was dancing I just cried. For the whole song. But I kept dancing and I felt so much lighter. And I realized I was moving more throughout the day in ways I enjoy because I finally didn’t feel like I ‘had’ to exercise in a certain way for a certain amount of time, which are mostly ways I that I don’t really enjoy.”
Me: Silence. “Beautiful.” (feeling of joy for her and sigh of relief)
She went on to make changes in her diet and routines. Easy changes. We also talked about ways to feel more joy every day. She let herself feel some feelings she hadn’t been wanting to feel. She went on to lose more weight. Most importantly to me, she felt happier. More at ease. She was more in tune with her body. She trusted herself about what to eat and when to eat. She trusted herself about when and how to move her body and when and how to rest her body.
There is science behind my two suggestions to my client. It has to do with shifting from fight or flight mode to rest and digest mode. It has to do with lowering cortisol in the body, the hormone that cues your body to store fat. It has to do with properly digesting your food which supports your body in utilizing it for energy and repair and rebuilding. And so much more I’m sure.
A lot of times I see women jump into some kind of weight loss plan or New Year’s resolution that’s very controlled and measurable when what most women need is to let loose a little in a healthy way. Give up control. Stop measuring and counting. Feel the happiness and breathe it in. Feel the sadness and breathe it out. Feel the fear. Feel the disappointment. Feel the anger. Breathe through it all. Move through it all.
So, today I am inviting you to the 21-Day Dance Challenge that starts Thursday, January 14th (but you can join anytime!) Oh yes, I am and there are women already signed-on and sharing their songs! What’s the challenge? You dance to one song a day when no one is watching. Unless you don’t care if anyone is watching and then you can dance with people. You just have to REALLY dance. That’s it. That’s the challenge.
Oh, and I’m giving away a few gifts if you participate in the 21-Day Dance Challenge Facebook group. The more you participate, the more chances you get to win something fun. All you have to do is click HERE to request to join the fun!
Here’s to getting healthy and having fun doing it!
